Joke?

My youngest daughter e-mailed me this joke. She has been suitably reprimanded and sent to bed!!!

Part I
Everybody who has a dog calls it "Rover" or "Boy"; I called mine "Sex". Now Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the city hall to renew his license, I told the clerk I wanted to have a license for Sex. He said "I'd like to have one too." Then I said "But this is a dog". He said he didn't care want she looked like. Then I said, "You don't understand, I've had Sex since I was 9 years old." He said I must have been quite a kid.

Then when I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the hotel clerk I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex. He said every room in the hotel was for sex. I said "You don't understand, Sex keeps me awake at nights." He said "Me too."


Part II
One day I entered Sex in a contest, but before before the competition began the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was hanging around. I told him that I planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me I should have sold tickets of my own. "But you don't understand," I said, "I hope to have sex on TV." He called me a show-off.

When my wife and me separated, we went to court to fight over the custody rights of the dog. I said "Your honor, I had Sex before we were married." The judge said "me too." Then I told him that after I married Sex left me. The judge said "Me too."

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking for him around town. A cop came over and asked me, "What are you doing in this dark alley at 4 in the morning?" I said "I'm looking for sex." My case comes up on Friday.

Blonde in Disguise!

Yesterday, I got in from work to find my eldest Daughter, Siobhan, in the biggest strop I'd seen for ages. It seems that my youngest daughter, Lauren, had written a note, forging my writing, requesting that Lauren put some washing in the washing machine and for Siobhan to clean the toilet.

It seems that Siobhan saw the note and thought that I would be cross if I got home and the jobs weren't completed. She duly cleaned the toilet and asked Lauren if she had completed her task yet. Lauren replied in the negative and Siobhan said in a very matter of fact way, "Well, you'd better hurry because Dad will not be pleased with you!" At this, Lauren just fell about laughing and Siobhan eventually realised what had happened.

You may not see the humour in this - but my eldest daughter is clearly a blonde in disguise!